When it is blazing hot we take fun inside. But today we worked. I took the entire day to train one command. My training titles are a tad different from the traditional dog blogs. Why, I am not a trainer, just a GSD mom, who is in over her head. I trained every hour on the hour for ten minutes. My command. Get off my effing lap. Now, she is a jumper, because she is a dog, but she is seventy pounds and my height. It ain’t cute. It was my first order of business and unless super thrilled or overly crazy, she no longer jumps on me as I stroll through my air conditioned sanctuary and our makeshift training grounds. Now, she is not a food girl. But I found her weakness bacon treats. Disgusting. Little tiny preshaped bones, are her version of cavier and because I am cheap and do not want a chubby pup. I break them up to almost a powder form that she licks with delight. I now smell like prefabricated bacon.

We worked from chair to chair in my house. Of course with both pups, because the other one is well a follower, and while he would never jump, he thinks he is working. Not so bright. Loving. But. He enjoys short walks, a bone, and getting brushed. She is killing me. All day she was amazing. I thought I had this off my to do list before school resumes. Nope. At the end of the night, up she came again and this time sat on my lap to watch TV. That little b**** . Literally. I ignored her as the experts say to ignore. I got up (interesting maneuver) and walked away, again the experts wise expertise. I sat in another chair and called her over and I gave her love when all paws were down, if one paw came up for a cute look at me, it was a stern stare, a hand before her face and a NO, a quiet one. This was my call. We did this in every chair with the added bacon. She did not jump. I brought her back to reality and put her to bed. She is truly more tired than I am. She knows she met her match. But she will test again and again and again. Until she gets that it is a hard no, or until I permanently smell like bacon. As for her buddy he got brushed ate a nice rawhide bone and was happy.